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Patricia Ann Rencher kicked off her Women of Color seminar by giving attendees a hint about their futures.
At about age 50, their roles as caregivers would probably begin--whether they were prepared or not. Rencher's presentation was all about how to prepare for these responsibilities, especially for women--because 60 percent of caregivers are women.
The pressures of being the family caregiver can take their toll quickly on today's businesswomen. As the U.S. population continues to age and the number of employee caregivers grows, eldercare issues will continue to affect worker productivity.
Emotional burnout, stress, and grief will reduce the productivity, creativity and overall performance of the caregiver. One way to minimize caregiver burnout is knowing how to prepare for the inevitable decline of a parent or elderly relative.
Rencher, the publisher of Urban Aging News, has served as a board member for the Michigan State Advisory Council on Aging (2015-2018), commissioner for Michigan Commission on Services to the Aging (2012-2015), and the Detroit Ambassador to the Greater Michigan Alzheimer's Association.
She is ultimately concerned with people aging with dignity and choice and giving adult children caregivers the information they need to help their parents make the best choices before dire circumstances force hasty decisions.
Urban Aging News advises older adults, their adult children, caregivers, and even service providers about low-cost services, many of which are offered nationwide because area agencies on aging are a result of the Older Americans Act that mandates that aging network services be available throughout the country.
Through her newspaper, she wants to get adult children and their parents thinking about how to care for parents before a crisis. And that's the key: most families don't have a plan in place.
She related her own story of how she and her sister were suddenly cast as caregivers of her parents, and how they handled it. Her mom died first, leaving her dad in his own home, which she says is the direction of care these days, rather than a rush to a nursing home.
And there's a network of caregivers that can make it possible for elderly parents to remain in their homes longer. But you've got to know where to look for the support services, and that begins with local councils on the aging and, perhaps later, with "underground" networks of caregivers, who are largely recommended through referrals.
Begin the Conversation
Rencher says you can begin a conversation like this: "Mom, what would happen in the event that you became infirmed or incapacitated? What do you want?" She recalls that she and her father sat down to write his entire funeral service.
"I knew he wanted a funeral, and I knew my mother did not. And so there was no way I could not have a funeral for him"-one more step Rencher took ahead of time that made one decision clear in an otherwise tumultuous time.
So Rencher advocates planning-having discussion after discussion if that's what it takes to determine what the best outcome is for an aging parent. Do you want to make plans for parents to remain in their homes? Consult an elder care attorney to see how that's financially feasible. And when it comes to your range of caregiving options, know your sources.
Good sources can be physicians.
Rencher advocates attending doctor's appointments with Mom and Dad to see if the physician is adept at handling geriatric issues such as diagnosing dementia rather than saying, "Well, I see old age has crept up on you."
Diagnosing dementia or Alzheimer's gives caregivers the opportunity to go to the Alzheimer's Association or their local council on aging to get support for a parent.
"You need to call the Alzheimer's Association because they have this service, whereby they will provide respite for caregivers. They provide adult day centers. They're excellent, and the issue that we're having in Detroit is--and the Alzheimer's Association knows this because we're sitting down and having some discussions we haven't gotten enough of this information out into Detroit for Detroit."
So the services are there if you know how to find them and if your parent qualifies.
To her audience of largely young professionals, she spoke earnestly.
"You're still in the workforce, so you're going have to utilize some of these services because A) you work and B) because you cannot be overwhelmed and because what good are you to your loved ones if you're burned out?"
Today, caregiver support is even offered by phone and online.